It’s fair to say that I’ve been on a bit of a downer lately. Going through a delightfully depressing phase of obsessively worrying about my health, torturing myself with what if’s, struggling to find much enjoyment in lifes’ simple pleasures and then beating myself up with a big stick for being so self indulgent and negative. Quite frankly, it’s exhausting. And, as a result of my gloomy demeanor, if parenting awards were being handed out in the vicinity I don’t think I’d have to lose much sleep over coming up with a witty but sincere acceptance speech. Mum of the year I most certainly ain’t.
So, you could have knocked me down with a feather last Saturday night when Jake uttered a few simple words that meant so much to me that I am seriously thinking of getting them tattooed somewhere about my person. Just so I don’t ever forget. Driving home at about nine pm having been to watch my beautiful niece and nephew perform in a dance show Jake asked me if I’d make him some macaroni cheese when we got home. Oh and could we watch that recorded episode of Modern Family as well? With a little bowl of crisps maybe? That would be nice, wouldn’t it, Mum? And then, before bed, we could turn over to I’m a Celeb? Can we, Mum? Can we?
Okay then sweetheart, seeing as it’s Saturday night and I’m such a total pushover.
And here comes the magic, never to be forgotten, must be documented moment that did me more good than he could ever know.
‘I love my life,’ Jake said simply, nestling back in the passenger seat and letting out a contented sigh. And I honestly felt my spirit soar. It flew.
Do you, Jake? Do you really? Because I’ve made a note of the date, time and location and will always remember that on Saturday November 16th 2012, somewhere between Penge and Tooting when you were nine and a quarter, you loved your life. Long may it continue my darling boy, because life certainly loves you.